This is how it happened...
Sitting there, I wondered how it would be if I was one of the contestants...
and I won!
Well... it was if a dam had burst somewhere in my mind, and a flood of yearning was released. Thoughts of carnal love with other women came unbidden over the next days and weeks, and I was shocked, embarrassed and confused by these thoughts. I found myself looking at other women on the street and while shopping... a particularly embarrassing moment occurred when a very attractive young teller at my bank caught me staring at her rather large chest! We both turned red, and I left the bank flustered and almost in tears... only to go home immediately and take a long shower...
I knew I had to do something about this, without fulfillment of these desires, I felt that I would soon go mad!
Well, what to do... I recalled over-hearing some conversation that my husband and his poker buddies were having when they had a game at our house. It seems that there were a great many "massage parlors" in the industrial areas to the north and east of Toronto where various illicit services could be had.
And I recalled seeing a curious abundance of "health spas", "massage studios", and "aromatherapy clinics" around the area of my old office...
After taking a drive up there and jotting down a few names from these store-fronts, I bought a local newspaper and matched up some of the names with some ads in the paper.
"Beautiful young European staff"... "Indian and Far East Girls"... "Six Lovely Oriental Attendants"... yes, my suspicions were correct!
Coincidentally enough, I had also around that time found my husband's hidden cache of sexy magazines, most of which were called "Oriental Women" and "Shaved Orientails". Many of the girls in the magazines were very cute and had a smoky sexuality... a shiver ran down my spine as I made my decision!
I made a visit to the "Bambi Studio" (the name has been changed, but it's the same place with the same staff), in order to get some basic information.
By the way, I was rather proud of the "detective work" that I was doing. It was exciting, in a dangerous way!
Well, the place looked very clean and well-maintained. I asked the receptionist if they ever had any female customers, and she said that they did have several regular lady customers. I then asked her for their rates, and after a momentary hesitation, she replied that the basic rate was C$30 (US$20) for 30 minutes. I looked at her and smiled, and she then told me that there was also a C$60 charge for a nude massage and C$80 for a "nude reverse rub" (in which the customer and attendant are both nude, and the customer may massage the attendant).
I thanked her, and asked if I could come in the following Monday for a nude reverse rub. She made a notation in a book, and that was that... I would return on Monday at noon...
Monday finally came, the last day of my husband's out-of-town trip. It was now or never, and although I had many second thoughts about going through with it, I showered, dressed and drove to the studio...
I walked in, and a very beautiful young woman glided over to greet me. She was wearing a flowered silk blouse, a long white clingy skirt, and a warm and friendly smile! She asked me to follow her, which I did... I noticed that she was a bit taller than me, and that she was wearing white thong panties beneath her sheer skirt.
She ushered me into a small, dimly lit room. There was a table/bed in the center, and a small bedside cabinet. The cabinet contained towels and bottles of oils and lotions, and a teapot with two cups stood on top of it. A long mirror ran along one wall, and there was soft music playing... a rather nice atmosphere!
The girl asked me to please pay her in advance, which I did. Then she told me to please undress, and that she would be back soon. So, I got undressed and lay on my stomach on the table, with only a small towel across my behind.
Then I heard a soft knock on the door, and she was back, favoring me with her sweet smile. She began to undress...
I felt a bit odd, so I began to make small-talk with her. She told me that she was 23, and of mixed Vietnamese and Malayan ancestry. She certainly had a very exotic look: long wavy black hair, very full dark rose colored lips, and a pale alabaster complexion. By the time she had removed all of her clothing, I could see that she had a very nice body. She was very slim, but curvaceous, and her breasts were medium sized and very round.
Oh, she also told me that her name was "Tammy", which I thought was very amusing... I was expecting something like "Plum Blossom" !
Well, Tammy oiled up her hands, it was time to begin. I was shaking slightly, and I knew that I was wet down there.
She began to rub my shoulders and upper back, firmly yet gently. She slowly worked her way down to the soles of my feet, then started back up again. I was becoming more relaxed from her expert attentions, but at the same time I was definitely becoming aroused from the touch of her soft slim hands on my body...
As Tammy began to massage my inner thighs, I raised my hips slightly... and her hands went right to my mound! I was shocked in spite of myself, swallowed convulsively, and went into a coughing fit, of all things!!
Tammy, looking quite concerned, helped me to sit up and brought me some tea from the bedside stand. As I sipped the delicious green tea, the urge to cough faded. I looked up at her, and I noticed that she was staring at my breasts. I looked down, and saw that my nipples were hard and standing out from the ariolas...
I had pretty much forgotten that I was naked, it just seemed so natural to be sitting there naked, drinking tea with her!
She gave me a reassuring smile, and motioned for me to lie down again, this time on my back.
Tammy oiled her hands again, and began to rub my neck and shoulders. Once again, I felt the tension drain out of me. Her hands then moved down to my breasts, and she began to actually massage them... not just feel them up, but massage them! It was an incredible feeling, her skilled fingers stroking me in a radiating motion towards, and then away from my nipples.
Then she began to include my nipples in with her massage, circling them, softly brushing them with her fingertips... and each touch sent a pulse of electric pleasure down to my groin...
I looked up at Tammy, and I reached out my hands to cup her breasts... oh, what a moment! I was actually holding another woman's breasts in my hands! And they were so soft, like my baby's bum when he was just a new-born...
I began to massage them in the same style as she was doing to me, and I could tell Tammy was enjoying my efforts. When I gently tugged on her nipples, she made the cutest little "squeaking" noise!
Well, with all this going on I was breathing faster, and my heart had speeded up...then Tammy moved one hand down to my mound again, slowly this time so as not to shock me.
I opened my thighs a bit, and I felt her fingers on the outer edges of my labia, softly stroking them. Such a perfect sensation: her touch was light, but not so light as to tickle. I opened my legs a little wider, and her warm fingers delved deeper into my genitals, softly, gently rubbing and stroking me.
One finger circled my opening, and then entered me almost excruciatingly slowly... deeper and deeper, until it was all the way inside me.
(All of her touching was done in the most gentle, yet insistent fashion, very very different from the way I had always been touched by a man. Tammy knew what she was doing, and what she was going to do, yet she did not fumble her way or hurry the process. This was not a rushed prelude to the "main event", this WAS the main event, and I was enjoying her ministrations beyond anything I had expected or imagined...)
Well... at that point, Tammy began to move her finger, ever so slightly... the movement had a purpose, however, and I felt her finger searching and finding many small pleasure centers inside me.
I have never been able to find my G-spot, in fact I wasn't even sure that I had one. But dear Tammy definitely found it, and perhaps my H, I, J and K-spots as well! She repeatedly brought me to brink of orgasm, then let me settle back, time and again... I felt myself losing control, on the verge of passing out... I managed to get a word out to her: "...please!".
Tammy then brought her head down to my pussy, and I felt the exquisite sensation of her warm wet lips and tongue exploring me as a butterfly sips sweet nectar from a flower... She took my lips into her mouth and gently nibbled them, one, then the other. Her hot, silky-soft tongue lapped my vulva, circling my clit, then gently sucking the little pearl... that did it, I was carried away by an immense wave of pleasure! The room spun, shrunk to a point, and exploded again and again, the only constant being Tammy's tongue on my clit.
My thighs then locked together around her head, as if by reflex. I heard Tammy struggling to speak, and the vibrations!!
Well, at last the waves ebbed, and the world returned to normalcy. My thighs relaxed and flopped open, and I felt completely satisfied and satiated. Lovely Tammy wasn't angry at all, thankfully, and she quickly dressed and went to get some warm wet towels...
I glanced over at my smiling face in the mirror, smiled at myself, and felt wonderfully at peace... Then Tammy returned, smiling sweetly, of course, and she cleaned me up like a mother does to her baby! She helped me to the shower, and afterwards to get dressed again.
I gave her a C$20 tip which she very much appreciated, and a kiss good-bye...
I must have driven home in a daze, because I cannot recall the trip at all! Later, as I recalled the experience to myself, I realized that I didn't really do anything to Tammy besides play with her breasts! Well, I'm not complaining, I'll just have to make a return visit...
All in all, it was a fantastic, unforgettable experience! Would it have been the same at another massage studio, with a different attendant? I don't think so, Tammy was something special, and I feel that I was very lucky to have been with her. As my first lesbian experience, it couldn't be beat! I can only hope that any future experiences will be as good, or if it's possible, better!
I do know, for certain, that a man could never have given me the sublime pleasure that Tammy did.
She knew WHERE to touch me, WHEN to stop one activity and begin another, WHAT the different pleasure centers of a woman are, and HOW to stimulate them in the most effective manner.
No going right for the clitoris, no fumbling about hoping to get things over with so that the "real" sex can begin... and no scratchy face between my thighs!
The only questions that remain are, are all women as skilled as Tammy? Is it a natural ability, or has Tammy honed her technique with experience?
I hope to find some answers when I return to the studio, and to Tammy...
I floated through the several weeks that followed my first experience with Tammy in somewhat of a daze. The session was never far from my mind, and my constantly re-telling it in DT just reinforced the delicious memories.
Yet at the same time I felt confused and even troubled... what did it mean?
Was I bi, lez, a "lipstick lesbian" even? Sure I had enjoyed the session, but so would anyone: simply laying there while one's hot buttons were so skillfully pushed.
I knew I had to go back and test the limits. Could I do it, could I make love to another woman?...
It was a windy, rainy day when I phoned the studio and asked if Tammy would be available. She was, and I asked the receptionist to tell her that I would be in at noon. I also asked her to call me back if Tammy didn't want to see me. I proceeded to shower and get dressed, hoping all the while that the phone wouldn't ring. I was ready to go at 11:30, and I left the house. The wind tore the umbrella right out of my hand as soon as I opened it, hmmm, this was not a good omen. Still, I told myself to stop being such a nervous-nelly and to think instead about what was going to happen at the studio...
I decided I would be up-front with Tammy, and tell her that I'd like her to relax while I massaged her. This was basically the "nude reverse" body rub that I had paid $80 for on my previous visit anyway, and I would try to assume the same role that Tammy had when she brought me to such ecstasy. Scenarios were going through my mind at a rapid pace, all of them appealing, and I felt a little tingling spasm deep inside me. I parked my car in the parking lot and checked my face in the mirror... was I looking flushed? Again, that little tingle... it was time to go.
A woman who I assumed was either the receptionist or one of the other girls working there greeted me, saying "hello" with a questioning look. She was also Asian, but older than Tammy, and she had a hardness about her that disturbed me. I suppose this type of person was what I had expected to see when I first visited the studio several weeks before.
I told her that I had an appointment with Tammy, and she broke into a grin... and not exactly a friendly grin either. I was definitely getting some bad vibes from this woman, and as I didn't know what to say at that point, I simply stared at her.
She flustered a bit, perhaps taking my silence as hostility, and then turned to go down the hallway, waving a hand for me to follow. She led me to a dim little room... whether it was the same one as before I really couldn't tell. I entered the room and turned to her to thank her, but all I saw was the door quickly closing and shutting in my face! I felt like crying... what was I doing here?!
Then, a soft knock at the door and it opened... and there was Tammy! When she saw me, she broke into a huge and very genuine smile, and she rushed over and embraced me before I quite knew what was happening. Tammy told me, in her lovely accented English, that she missed me and that she was hoping I would return. I immediately felt my worries slip away as she beamed at me! My eyes had adjusted to the light, and I noticed Tammy was wearing a black flowered silk sun-dress... she looked wonderful, and I felt myself flush again...
She giggled demurely, and said she would be back in a few minutes. Before she turned to leave, I smiled and held out $100 (as per the House's payment policy). She took it from me with a very grateful "Thank You". As she bowed her head and then glanced up at me, I saw a twinkle in her eye... she knew what I wanted and what I was paying her extra for. She had quickly and expertly fingered the bills and noted the amount, and I was struck at the contrast: her sweet submissive attitude combined with the street-savvy of a professional who was used to handling money. I watched her behind shift and sway beneath the thin material of her dress as she covered the distance to the door, and noticed the tell-tale lines of thong panties, panties which I was hoping to remove myself in a few minutes...
Already beginning to shiver with anticipation, I got undressed and folded my clothes carefully. My bra and finally panties (surprisingly without a wet spot) joined my neatly folded skirt and blouse on a chair, my sandals on the floor beneath. I lay down upon the table, and adjusted the small towel across my behind, gasping slightly as my hardened nipples touched the cool linen sheet on the table. Then I willed myself to relax, and listened to the noises outside the door. Women's voices, men's voices, the click-clack of heels on the linoleum floor growing louder as they approached. A knock on the door, and I turned my head to see the knob turning and Tammy entering, her smile once again blooming as she met my glance. She asked me how I was, how my son was, typical small talk... but all the while she was undressing. She slipped the spaghetti straps of her dress off her shoulders, and gave a shrug... the dress dropped to the floor. She looked at me with a more serious, almost hungry gaze as her delicate hands went to the front of her black lacy bra and undid the front clasp... her breasts practically burst free, and another little shrug sent the bra to the floor (and her breasts to jiggling delightfully), joining her dress
Again, I was struck by the beauty of her body, the exquisite curves and healthy glow of her pale silky skin. Tammy had paused, knowing I was taking in the sight of her, but then she giggled sweetly and moved to the bedside table. I was aching to touch her, but I also yearned to feel her hands on me. I would let her expert hands massage and relax me, then I would ask her to change places with me...
I knew that my plan was unravelling, I hadn't told Tammy what I wanted to do today, and she had undressed herself before I thought to tell her I wanted to undress her. I knew that if I didn't speak up, this session would go the same way as the last... not a bad thing at all, but it wouldn't answer the questions in my mind.
While I was giving myself a talking-to, Tammy had been oiling up her hands and now I felt them on my shoulders, applying delightfully soft yet firm pressure. How could I ask her to stop? I would, though, when she asked me to turn over - that would be the "point of no return". So I let myself be relaxed by her soothing hands, and followed their progress down my body, noting how they lingered at my inner thighs and behind. I shifted to open my thighs for her, and her hands moved to the exposed areas without hesitation. I knew I was wet, and I knew she knew also...
Finally she asked me to please turn over, but instead I sat up and asked if we could trade places. She hesitated for a fraction of a second, but then smiled and nodded... a thrill ran through me as I realized I would soon be massaging her young beautiful body.
As I stood up, she embraced me and gave me a quick little kiss. I returned her embrace and pulled her to me... our bodies came together and our breasts touched, then were pressed together as she hugged me tightly. Her body was so soft and warm, and the scent of her moisturizer combined with another, muskier scent filled my mind. I kissed her, and although she didn't return the kiss with much passion, she did open her lips slightly and our tongues met... a little "mmm" escaped me when that happened. My hands were stroking her back, from the nape of her neck down to (and into) the crack of her behind, and I felt my level of arousal rising quickly.
Tammy knew this, and gently pulled away. She lay down on the massage table, on her belly, and glanced at me invitingly... well, here was the moment I had waited for, she was mine and I could do as I pleased, touch where I wanted... I oiled my hands from the bottle on the table, and began to massage her shoulders and back. Tammy closed her eyes, and I continued to rub her, delighting in the curves of her body. Several times I tugged on one of my nipples, or reached down to slide an oily finger over my clitoris... I was tremendously excited and wetter than I could ever remember. I could feel the wetness on my inner thighs and my nipples stood out from my ariolae like little thimbles.
By this time my hands had worked themselves down to Tammy's lovely round behind. Was she asleep, or just relaxing, enjoying what I was doing? Then I saw her legs open a bit... she knew what I wanted to do and she wanted it also!
My hands kneaded Tammy's firm bum cheeks, making circles and spreading her open again and again. Every time her buttocks opened I could see her labia also open a bit, and her anus would clench - suddenly I was seized by an impulse, and, holding her cheeks open I leaned in quickly and speared her anus with my tongue! Tammy squeaked and contracted her rosebud, but my tongue had already penetrated a good inch or so inside her. A truly indescribable feeling, and I felt SO naughty! I pulled back and she gasped, then moaned... was I having some affect on her?
As I continued to deeply knead her buttocks, her hips began to move, seeming to follow my hands. Now it was time to move to the next step.
I reached my hands under her hip bones and gently pulled up. Tammy knew that I wanted her to be on her knees, on all fours, and she did so. This remains the sexiest pose I think a woman can get into... head on a pillow, elbows on the bed, bum in the air and legs parted. I had to step back and take in the view of Tammy's exquisite behind. She turned her head to glance back at me and smiled her sweet little smile, such a contrast from the blatantly sexual position she was in. Now it was time for the moment of truth for me...
I climbed onto the table behind her, also on all fours (it must have been quite a sight *s*). Tammy moaned again as my hands softly began to stroke her inner thighs. It was more of a sigh than a moan, and I'll never forget that sound. My hands roamed over her buttocks, slipping between them and under them to stroke her labia, then trailing over her rosebud again causing it to flex. I moved closer, and breathed in her rich musky fragrance. I also saw the wetness escaping from her vagina - so, she was excited! I darted my tongue out and began flicking it over her labia. Tammy sighed again and spread her legs wider, her knees at the edges of the table. Her juices had a salty sweet taste similar to my own, but different also. As my tongue penetrated her vagina I tasted an odd metallic tone, like when your tongue touches a tin can.
Well, there I was, lapping away... I could hardly believe it. Yet my arousal had plateaued, perhaps because I was so busy noticing things. Tammy too didn't appear to be getting any more excited. I moved my tongue to her anus again, hoping for a reaction, but she remained silent. Her anus had a rubbery texture and resisted my attempts to probe deeper. As I brought my finger to Tammy's vagina and slowly inserted it, she pulled away a bit and said "please don't". I knew it was because of the place's rules, but I was still disappointed, after all she had her finger deep inside me on my previous visit.
So, I continued lapping away for a little while until Tammy turned and said "I'm sorry Susan, the time..."
I looked up at the clock and saw that I had been there for almost 50 minutes. Although I was disappointed that the session was over, I also had feelings of frustration and confusion. Tammy didn't seem to enjoy my technique... did I even HAVE a technique? And I felt something was missing from the experience...
Driving home, I realized that I felt the same emptiness after the first visit with Tammy, only that time it had been masked by the afterglow of my orgasm. Yes, I had had sex with another woman, I could do it, and I liked it. And, I wanted to do it again. But not this way.
It sounds trite and cute, but without love, sex is just an act, a function. A pleasurable function, certainly, like eating a gourmet meal... but a nice dinner isn't complete without atmosphere, comfort, conversation, someone to share the experience with. I couldn't share my pleasure with Tammy, and I only wanted to bring her pleasure to see if I could.
If I loved Tammy, and she loved me... this was what was lacking, as it so often is. And just as sex without love is just a physical function, sex WITH love is a celebration of our humanity, a true gift both given and received at the same time. Our minds, thoughts, emotions... they put the "love" into love-making.
Do I sound naive? Well, maybe I am, or at least maybe I was. I've learned some lessons that some people never learn, the Key to happiness perhaps.
The Key is Love.
I put a little phrase into my profile at DT sometimes, something that just stuck in my mind: "with a Kiss, she gives me the Key"... to me, that kiss is a confirmation of love, and as a kiss is returned, so is the love, and such is the Key to true pleasure.
I don't regret my visits to Tammy. Not at all, I was able to learn about myself, what kind of person I really am. What I thought was a net negative experience (my "failure" as a lover?) turned out to be a very positive lesson in growth and understanding. My growth as a person, and my understanding of the forces that make us human, and make us happy humans.
It's been 14 months since my second visit to Tammy, and only now, with the help of a truly wonderful person who I love very dearly and deeply, have I been able to really understand what happened to me that day.
Sometimes, the most important lessons are not learned quickly, nor happily...
but they ARE worth learning.
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